Dinner

During my Thanksgiving break I had the privilege to have dinner with someone who suffers from schizophrenia. When starting my research, that's all I had in mind! To sit down, and talk face to face with a schizophrenic. I wanted to see personally if it was obvious that they had a mental illness, to see if they acted any different from the rest of us normal people, to personally gain more experience and knowledge with this subject.
I know for some of you guys it would be the last thing you would want to do, because of what you heard about this illness. The danger, the aggression, and random attacks. But like I've stated in my past blog, they can live a normal life, be friendly and do things they did before the diagnose. My mother thought I was crazy bringing her to the house for dinner. I was excited.  And let me tell you, she was nothing like I had imagined...well sort of.
Unfortunately, taping the dinner was a bit out of the question. I didn't want her to feel uncomfortable or intimidated by anything around her. I was writing notes on some of the questions I had asked her, and will share shortly with you too, I just want to share a bit of background information about her past and what she and her family have, and will continue to deal with...
Her name is Ali.
She is 24 years old and has a younger sister who is 20.
She lives with her mother, and sister.
Her diagnosed was a big surprise to her family, and she just accepted the fact to being a schizophrenic two years ago. She was diagnosed with this mental illness when she was 20, although she had symptoms starting when she was 17.
Being a teen and having schizophrenic symptoms is very difficult to determine if its actually a mental illness or if its just her being a teen. She always wanted to be alone, her appetite was very low, her music choice changed. She was going out and would get into trouble with others, picking fights and arguments with anyone who disagreed with her. Her 4.0 G.P.A. dropped down below 2.0. Since she was the first born and that's the stage where teenagers are known to do these things, her mom thought it was normal, and she soon would realize her bad habits would change.
But they didn't.
Her mom had to pick her up from the hospital because she had attempted to commit suicide. Apparently this wasn't the first time, but it got to the point where she almost succeeded. Her mom finally realized that there was something wrong. It wasn't just her being a rebellious teen anymore. Many test were ran and finally they were told she had schizophrenia. She has attacks, she forgets things, she isolates herself at times, she goes to school, has a part time job, and is soon getting married. I think her mom had the hardest time dealing with her illness. She lost her first born child as a teen, and although she will never be the same, she is still here living every day.

Hey Ali, can you tell me a bit about you?
I work and go to school. ummmm I like my job a lot! I eat cookies a lot too. Right mom?They're good.
Do you like cookies?
Me: Yes I do. I love sweets.
I like to draw when I have time, and sometimes go for walks. But I have to take my sister with me. Right?

How is school and work going for you?
Start. I tried telling my mom I need new shoes, but she says I have enough.
No one takes me seriously about it, but I think its an issue now, look!
Me: They look brand new, maybe you can ask that for Christmas?
No. School is boring, but I had a report due. I was scared ummmmm but I did it. End.

What about work?
Work? (Looks over to her mom)
Next. End.

Okay, Ali are you sick?
(looks at mom for reassurance, her mom nods and says yes.) Start. Well, look I loose track of my thoughts because I'm crazy. No. Not crazy. I feel good you know? I don't have a stuffy nose and headache's or feel sore...do you?
Me: No. not at all.
I like to be alone when I draw, I draw about life. One day I drew all the birds that were talking to me when I was waiting for the bus(she laughs). It was very funny! Right mom?

I had asked her why she likes to take long walks? I asked her if one day I can join her, since I myself enjoy them...this is when her mom noticed her facial expressions and told me that she was hearing voices. Her mom knows every moment she gets them and decided to let her have some space and calm down. She went outside with her sister for a few minutes, then came back.

Hey what happen? Are you okay? I can stop asking questions if that's what you want?
No. Its okay? Start. Right? Where were we? Oh right...ummmm wait no. I forgot.
End.
(Voices again)

Is there anything else you want to tell me?
I like you. Your very funny and pretty.
Me: Thanks! So are you.
Maybe we can hang out (voices)
No. End. I'll have to get back to you on that one...I'm not sure I have time.
Me: It's okay, whenever you can
I know I'm sick. I just don't like anyone to know about it, because....umm...End.
(Voices)



As you can see, she answered most of my questions, and sometimes went off track...She has never been interviewed or sat down for so long and it made her uncomfortable. So we ended shortly after we ate.
It was very interesting, and gave me my personal experience that I wanted. Although its hard to tell the difference by my posting this, in person it's different.
I did notice some things about her. When she would talk, she would say "start" and when she finished her response she would say "end". I was very confused and didn't know why she was doing it. She starred directly at me during our whole conversation, not looking away. (It was weird, so I would look away sometimes. She just gave me a smirk when I looked back a her) She answered my questions right away and sometimes twitched her head from side to side like a toddler does when they want something and they use the "I'm cute, give it to me" look. Telling me that she was done with that question. She would turn to her mom or sister and say "right guys?" to reassure me that she was telling the truth.
Altogether, my dinner was great.
Oh, by the way she changed her name to MiMi.
No one knows why, but who cares!
I'm happy to say that MiMi is doing well, and her family is there to support her along the way. They have supported her through all this time and will continue to do so.